I’m the worst waitress I’ve ever met. I forget orders, I drop food, I eat garlic knots on the main floor — while on the clock, I get offended if someone asks for a refill without looking me in the eye, I check my phone every 5 minutes, I cry in the bathroom, I eat food and avoid work in the bathroom, I don’t wear my uniform with pride, and I flirt with the bartender. Although the last part shouldn’t mean I’m a bad server, it just means I have A.D.D. and am looking for a discount on drinks after my shift… So we got this clear. I’m not good at this particular job, because honestly, I’m a spoiled brat from the upper class suburbs, and if one more customer asks me for a filet mignon medium rare, and a side of spaghetti marinara for their loud mouth seven year old son, I will throw it in their face. So why the fuck didn’t I get the hint that *maybe* my side job should NOT be serving others in the realm of the food industry. I’m not sure. What I do know is, it all happened for a reason *__*
Want to make yourself feel better? Here are the jobs I’ve been fired from and why…
Sushi restaurant: I was always five minutes late… So my boss says “next time you’re late you’re fired.” The next time rolls around and I think my call time is at 4pm so I show up at 3:50pm. The boss’s little Japanese mother walks up to me and says, “Song-Su says he don’t need you today… He doesn’t need you evah.” I said “WHY?! I’m EARLY!” She says “You’re 50 minute late.” … I should’ve checked the new schedule. That was a fucking trick.
Babysitting 2 twin boys: I stole their adderoll. And the mom put camera’s in the kitchen… Whatever, who the hell gives 7 year old boys 30 mg of adderoll a day?
Catering job at Paramount for independent company-no names: I was caught eating the appetizers in the bathroom for 30 minutes and didn’t bother to serve… Anyone.
Catering job #2 in LA: I was texting on my phone in the kitchen and the asshole chef said “will you NOT text in MY kitchen?” I said “My AUNT is DYING!” He said “Let me see the text then.” I said “No.” He said “Get out.” … Rude.
ActNOW studios (on Ventura blvd): I wasn’t answering the phones correctly and didn’t know how to produce a workshop?.. I still think this is bullshit. There are some HATERS at ActNOW who told on me cuz they are jealous of my swag. I’m so over them. I’ve taken my business elsewhere. You should too.
Italian Restaurant: I ate garlic bread while seating people… Okaaaay?..
Admin work for a Dating Coach Company: They said I was working with competitor companies… First of all, I don’t care enough about YOUR company to work for a competitor. Why the fuck would I wanna work for the same thing somewhere else? Second of all, I know that employer had a personal vendetta against me.
Go-Go dancer at gay club in WeHo: I wasn’t manly enough.
Jobs I’ve quit the first week…
Selling skydiving packages on college campus’s: I’ve never been sky-diving, what the fuck did I know?
Second grade after school teacher: the kids were annoying
Restaurant in Korea Town: Hours were too long, pay was too low, and I’d rather be broke and party, than decently able to pay rent, and hate my life
Assistant work for producer: He got creepy. I lied and said I have a sick aunt. (I use this one a lot, because I don’t have any aunt’s, just uncles, so I feel the karma won’t be as bad.)
Management position at catering company: They actually asked me to do dishes. I don’t do dishes. I just wanted to boss people around, but apparently this position called for responsibility.
Babysitting 2 year old girl: I didn’t change her diaper…
In conclusion: I will stick to writing/acting/producing and I will continue to work for myself. What about YOU?